Copied shamelessly from my Facebook post. Must stop doing that.
Ok, I didn't qualify, unless you count entering a random ballot and having your name picked out of a hat. Luckily that's exactly what the lovely people at ITU do to allow numpties like me (tactical or otherwise) to have a go if we think we're hard enough.
RACE BRIEFING
Well, I'm sure there was one, but I was far too busy shopping - we were right next to Oxford Street after all. Problem is, I'm not sure that a 4 hour shopping trip is an appropriate warm-up for the World Champs. In fact I was knackered before we even made it to Hamleys. Luckily CS was on hand to carry all the shopping. If only he could carry me too....
SWIM 750m - 20 mins. (209/259)
I'm not sure where I left my swim legs. Or arms for that matter. But at least I didn't do backstroke and go in circles, like someone in the previous wave did. Got kicked in the face, arms & teeth, and that was just by me for being so pants at swimming. Oh well, onwards and eastwards, as they say.
T1 - Forever. Bless.
Still haven't got the hang of it. But at least I remembered to take my gel, put on my race number, shades and helmet before leaving T1. Only had to come back once, and that was because I forgot the bike.
BIKE 22.5k - 44 mins. (69/259)
Interesting route - very twisty-turny with a couple of hairpin bends. I learned midway through the course that us slow coaches are supposed to stay on the right and be overtaken on the left instead of the other way round. Oh, didn't we all laugh? Well, most of the laughing was from me, and now when I think about it, none of the lycra-clad speed-freaks thought it was funny at all. Oh well, bygones. Chicked a few blokes, and gained back some places over some other women.
T2 - Forever. Bless.
But seriously, they made us run loads - I reckon I covered most of the run course during T1 and T2 - not including having to go back to pick up the bike for the bike section, and having to go back to drop the bike off for the run section (apparently, according to the marshalls, you're not allowed to cycle the run course, no matter how much shopping you've done earlier in the day)
RUN 5k - 26 mins. (159/259)
Pardon? I got overtaken by an elderly lady with a limp who sniggered at me while passing. And I've never run 5k faster than 27:something. That can't be right..... Or can it? Inspirational Steve and Eversmiling Kay were there to cheer me in, and bless them, they cheered me up too.
T3 - Forever. Bless.
Back to hotel, shower, change. Yes, I was so long doing that whole triathlon lark that we were running (pardon the pun) late for the poker, so we had to leg it back to the hotel, put normal clothes on, realise I hadn't had a shower, take normal clothes off again, have shower, put normal clothes on again, and skedaddle* to the casino.
POKER TOURNAMENT - 21st out of 112. Now that's what I call a result!
* Skedaddle - a sort of run/walk/stumble that can only be achieved through a full day's worth of physical exertion in uncomfortable shoes. Not a pleasant sight, and I certainly don't plan on doing that ever again. Until 5th October, when I will probably "skedaddle" my way through the half iron half marathon. If I'm lucky.
To Do - Add on the Women, Inspirational Steve, Marianne Clark, ITU Womens Race and Nonny Non, Mens Race, tactical numptiness.
